Reading the cues of your baby or child
What are cues?
By being able to identify stress cues, you can look out for signs that your baby or child is becoming unsettled. This will help you to know when to help them rest or take part in calming activities.
When you are playing or interacting with your baby or child, or doing daily tasks such as dressing them, changing their nappy or feeding them look out for signs of stress.
If you notice a number of the stress cues below give them a few moments to see if stopping the activity gives them a chance to ‘recover’ themselves. If your baby or child remains unsettled try using some strategies described in the accompanying leaflet. Once they appear settled, and ready again, you can try again.
If you have to break several times then maybe you need to stop that activity or at least slow your pace.
Reading the cues of your baby
When your baby is settled and calm
- Breathing is smooth and regular
- Usual colouring of skin
- Normal burping
- Occasional tremors, startles, twitches are normal
- Is normal for some spitting up or hiccoughing
- Muscles feel ready for action and baby is moving limbs around smoothly
- Hands are together and towards their face
- Calm and alert / focussed
- Sleeps deeply smoothly waking
- Settles when sucking
When your baby is unsettled and stressed
- Breathing irregular, shallow or laboured
- Skin flushed or maybe paler than usual
- Coughing, gasping, sneezing, yawning
- Twitching
- Tremor/quivering of any part of the body
- Startle reaction
- Muscles feel too floppy or stiff – baby may not be moving arms or legs much
- Arms straight and fingers open wide
- Toes maybe splayed
- Holding hands tightly closed
- Jerky movements in arms/legs
- Arching backwards
- Mouth open limply, make look exhausted
- Lethargic – eyes only slightly opening, moves very little
- Overly alert – eyes very widely open, intensely looking, not easy for them to look away
- Looking away from your face or object
- Unpredictable crying / easily upset
Reading the cues of your child
When your child is settled and calm
- Breathing is smooth and regular
- Usual colouring of skin
- Normal burping
- Hands may be towards each other in the middle
- Calm and alert, focused
- Sleeps deeply smoothly waking
- Settles when sucking (if a younger child)
When your child is unsettled and stressed
- Breathing irregular, shallow or laboured
- Skin flushed or maybe paler than usual
- Unpredictable crying, easily upset
- Muscles feel too floppy or stiff – child may not be moving arms or legs much
- Arms straight and fingers open wide
- Toes maybe splayed
- Holding hands tightly closed
- Jerky movements in arms/legs
- Arching backwards
- Mouth open limply, make look exhausted
- Lethargic – eyes only slightly opening, moves very little
- Overly alert – eyes very widely open, intensely looking, not easy for them to look away
- Looking away from your face or object
